“Not forgiving, it’s like drinking a glass of poison and waiting for your enemies to die,” Nelson Mandela said.
The process of forgiving someone for what they have done is necessary to do it for yourself, it is an act of self-love. If you wonder what that has to do with me, if I didn’t do anything? And if I forgive him, does that mean I approve of what he did?
Forgiveness is necessary in order to free yourself from the chains of negative emotions (anger, rage, sadness, fear …) that keep you trapped in the past like a prisoner. Forgiveness is not approving what the person did, but accepting what happened and leaving it where it belongs – in the past.
In Gestalt Therapy different techniques are used with which you can work to close cycles without the presence of the person with whom you have unfinished cycles. Because all these emotions and thoughts are inside you, they destroy you day by day.
The first step is to recognize these emotions and thoughts, realize how present they are in your actions, decisions, your mood … and accept them, feel them consciously and make a decision to face them and work on them.
Forgive because of you, because you deserve to be happy!
Anita Chukaleska,
Psychologist, Gestalt Therapist. 25 of January 2021